Sunday, August 3, 2008

Family

I'm happy and sad tonight. We just got home from visiting my brother and his family, who are moving out of town very soon. This was our last gathering in their house here. Next time, visiting them will mean a five-hour drive, rather than a 30-minute one. It also means we won't have any family in the city. Also, my only friend at work is moving too. Again, very soon.
Anyway, the happiness part of it is that we had a lovely weekend with my family. I've been feeling lately that I need to spend more time with my mom. I sort of feel like she needs me, but it's probably just as much that I'm needing her. One reason is that I miss her; we haven't had a lot of time with just the two of us much this year. And also because work is just so damn hard these days.
I'm going to have to let my boss feel like she's truly my "manager". Clearly she wants to "manage" me, so I think the only way to survive this is to actively make her feel as though I'm deferring to her. I asked my parents for their advice, and both agreed. And in fact my mom had a very similar situation at work when she was in her 40s having a much younger boss.
One of my old bosses used to get very edgy as soon as he felt like he didn't know what was going on, and the only way to get him off your back was to get in his face with daily detailed reports on what you were doing. Since my current boss no longer sits five feet away from me, she seems to be having the same kind of issues. So starting Tuesday, I will give her my morning agenda, along with a request for her input on priorities, like, does she agree. Then before I leave, I'll update her on what I accomplished. She hasn't asked for this, but I think it's what she wants.
Ugh.
Okay, back to happiness: I felt very loved and supported this weekend. I needed it and I got it.

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